Dearest John

In looking through your things (as I have felt obliged to do on your behalf, as part of a general clear out), one thing I have found is that in many of your boxes, I find a few small pieces of coloured card, cut out from all sorts of bits of packaging (presumably) – it’s always card not paper.

I started to keep these when I first found some, and have now accumulated quite a massive box of them – hundreds and hundreds.  I may once or twice have seen you cutting some bits of card, but I had no idea you had done it so often.  It’s almost as if it was a lifelong habit, as I’m finding so many little bits, in all sorts of old boxes and containers.

I can only assume you meant to create some sort of art work, perhaps just a collage in order to enjoy/’celebrate’ the various beautiful colours (all the pieces are plain bold colours rather than being patterned).  It’s just unfortunate that you never mentioned it so I don’t know what you intended.  (Was this just a chance omission or were you keeping this habit secret?  Perhaps you wanted to surprise me with the outcome someday.)

I very much want to turn these pieces of coloured card into a work of art in tribute to you – they have become almost the most significant items you have left me with.

I feel so sorry for you, that you must have cut them out and kept them so often, over so long, and yet in the end never had the time to do whatever it was you wanted to do with them.

Maybe whatever I create won’t be what you intended at all.  But I will do it, John, I will create a huge collage of your little bits of cardboard, and it will have pride of place in my home.

You may not have done the final step, but in the cutting out and keeping over the years, you have created a work of art, John.  It will be a joint effort.