Found Literature 2009

Snippets of conversations overheard ‘in passing’

(All genuine!!)

I’m not going to stand here and lie to you and say everything’s alright when it’s not.

The chef said yes, any night, he will have the rabbit.

In Thailand there is definitely a season.

It’s really simple, just try opening it yourself and you’ll see.

She thinks she’s so attractive – ugh – I’ve seen better stuff on the bottom of my shoe.

Anyway, they wanted me back, so that was it.

… a swanky white flat …

I was walking round like an idiot for ages.

There’s a little parking space next to the Suzuki garage.

My life is just sh*t, when you think about it.

Thieving Magpie?  There’s a piece of music called the Thieving Magpie, Lucy.

… very, very trendy – she was wearing blue leggings …

When you see bread here, you must take it upstairs.

So I won my case – I didn’t even have to go to court!

We need more people – straight ones!

… listen I’ve told you before and I’m telling you again, don’t f*ck with me …

I’m looking forward to that like a hole in the head.

When you say ‘tide’s in’, what do you mean, sorry?

It was a proper dodgy setup!

So I said to my manager, I said …

Look what they’re doing – they’re both looking at her.

When I get home I’ll count me money.

You are infuriating!   – –  As are you, Sophie!

Was that the most expensive w*nk you’ve ever had?

We’ve got a red onion as well.

Don’t you think it’s crazy?

Carol’s little boy got bitten by a reindeer.

I wish we lived in Charing Cross.

First things first, let’s go and get a cup of tea.

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